Monday, May 31, 2010

Mindset Monday: Fear of Rejection Cured by Being a Good Servant?

I was listening to a recorded Q&A session with a business mentor of mine today and a few of the questions were mindset type questions.  One of them in particular really resonated with dealt with feelings of rejection.

One of the callers was explaining that they were fearful of rejection when in the middle of the sale process with a potential client.  Because of this fear, the caller was having a hard time in her business and she was thinking of closing up shop and going back to the corporate grind.

The mentor told her that there were one or two reasons why she may have had this fear.  One, she probably had the mindset that she was about to "take" something from the client and therefore did not appear confident in her sales presentation.  People can smell it a mile away when we are not confident about our product and services.  If we don't believe in them, why should they?

Solution?  She should think of herself as a good servant.  Approach the sales process with the mindset that she is being of service instead of "taking" something from the prospect.  If she can get her mind around that, then she'll also be more confident.  And confidence sells!

Second, there may have been a moment in her life where she put herself out there in a big way, and for some reason, was rejected.  Like asking that cute boy at the 6th grade dance if he wanted to dance and he said no.  (Or like when you attend a networking event for the first time and don't know anyone there.  You try to start a conversation with someone you don't know and they blow you off for someone else they want to chat with.)

Been there, done that!

The mentor went on to say that perhaps these types of situations happened several times in her life.  The combination of these episodes may have caused her to create some sort of negative meaning around rejection that was causing her to be "stuck" in closing the sale in her business.

Solution?  She should search her soul for those moments of rejection and realize that they have nothing to do with her current situation.  Those moments of rejection were a moment in time and have nothing to do with where she is now.  Those moments of rejection make no difference in whether or not she will gain another client in the here and now.  She needs to come to terms with this fact and put it in the past where it belongs.

(A new phrase I learned recently from Rev Run goes something like this..."Leave the past in the past...there is a reason it didn't make it to your future!")

What IS important is that she provides the solution to a gap that her potential client is experiencing.  The gap is between what they have and what they need or want.  When they reach out to her, they feel as if her expertise will fill that gap.  Helping them to understand that gap and how her product or service fills it, is one of the most important ingredients in business...and is all about being of service.  And nothing about "taking" anything from them.

I certainly feel you?

Until next time...

Aspire to Plan!


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